It’s not often that I write a blog post “just for fun.” However, this might be one of those blog posts. Maybe . . . . If you’re a regular reader of my blog you’ll know that last fall I spent three months living in hotels in Houston while trying to see if I could find an affordable place to live on my social security income. Unfortunately, and after much effort, it didn’t materialize, and I ended up returning to Orlando at the beginning of January where I have since still not been able to find an affordable place to live. I guess some things just don’t change very easily. . . .
One day back at the end of October while I was driving around Houston, I ran into a radio station, 100.3 FM, “The Bull,” which plays country music. Now, first off, I need to make it clear that I’ve been a “rock ‘n roller” since I was old enough to shake my booty, and I’ve never been a big fan of country music but then again I never really listened to it, either. However, I made the discovery that country music is a lot different now then I remembered it being years ago, and it has a lot more feel of “rock” to it now (as in “country rock”). And a song came on that I just really liked. In fact, I like it so much I wrote a blog post I titled after the song which was written by Luke Bryan and Eric Church and sung by Jason Aldean titled, “The Only Way I Know.” And I discovered just how much I liked the new country music (with a rock twist, of course).
Fast forward nine months later and here we are, in America, about to celebrate the 4th of July in three more days. I’m still living in a hotel and still looking for more affordable housing–maybe it’s time to try Houston again after being back in Orlando six months now with no luck, but then again I’m in no hurry to return to Houston, either, and hotels are everywhere so maybe someplace new is in order. Anyway, there are a couple of new country songs that talk about a particular topic from two different perspectives, and that topic is love. . . .
The title of this blog post comes from a combination of the titles from two songs that are very popular on the country music scene right now. The two songs come from the two different gender perspectives (one female, one male). The first song, which comes from a woman’s perspective, is titled, “Love Me Like You Mean It,” sung by Kelsea Ballerini:
And the second song, which comes from a man’s perspective, is titled, “Baby Be My Love Song,” sung by Easton Corbin:
Now, first off, I’ve never been into one night stands and free-wheeling sex even though I’m a product of the hippie generation which started the sexual revolution in a big way back in the late 60’s. And I realize (and almost didn’t post it) that the second song from the male perspective definitely implies it right off the bat. The female version in the first song has it right from most women’s perspective, but obviously not the perspective of all women as sex has been used by certain women since the beginning of time to get what they want or, well, whatever. . . .
And second, I’m a Christian. Now I know that term has all kinds of meaning nowadays and some say that Christians can do whatever they want. That’s not true and it never has been, either, but there are folks out there who peddle their wares in order to make a decent living off of it (in fact, a lot of money can be made from it), and Pied Pipers are everywhere. However, when I have any questions, I open the Bible. That’s our instruction manual.
That is not to say that our culture hasn’t been a powerful force in shaping even the Christians among us. It has, and it’s done a good job at watering down what the Bible has to say about a lot of stuff, and one of those really big areas is sex. I remember years ago hearing a saying that goes like this:
“Women give sex to get love and men give love to get sex” (you can Google it if you want more information). And it is a fairly accurate statement on the surface, but don’t look too far beneath it.
While I may be old now (63, which to a 20-year-old and maybe even some 30-year-olds makes me pretty much look like ancient history), nothing much has changed since I was 20. Actually, I started getting hit on by men when I was 13 (I developed early with an attribute that stood out). I was shy and I ignored their advances, but by the time I hit my teens the hippies were making themselves known and the sexual revolution was well underway by the time I was in high school. Overnight, it seemed, sex had become a free-for-all. To not do it was so very uncool . . . . and, of course, the birth control pill had been developed and marketed to American women in the early 60’s. Of course, nobody brought up the subject of sexually transmitted diseases, which proliferate to this day.
The pressure on young women to have sex when I was young was tremendous. And respect went down the proverbial toilet. I watched as my female friends went down that road and usually got burned but the biggest reason I didn’t partake in all the “activity” was because I was a Christian, and I truly believed sex was for marriage, period. It’s not that I didn’t make mistakes (the pressure was huge) as I was engaged twice, nor that I wasn’t curious (I was), but it was a bedrock issue with me that, in my own case, sex is for marriage. Others could do what they wanted, but that didn’t mean I was going to join them.
Since that time as the decades have passed it appears to have only gotten worse. Sex doesn’t mean much of anything to anyone anymore and they do whatever they want. Civility in our society has waned, big time, and I’m not sure that young people today are raised with any kind of morals that aren’t undone by society-at-large once they are out from under parental control. And, I’m not sure some parents even teach any kind of morality (when it comes to sex) anymore. I remember when I was in my 20’s that a woman I knew who had a very young daughter said to me that as soon as her daughter was old enough she was going to take her to the doctor and get her on birth control pills (she did, too, so what did that teach her daughter about sex?). That’s been almost 40 years ago now and I can’t imagine how much farther down that road society has gone since then. Are sexual morals even taught anymore? If they are they appear to be quickly undone by our culture.
While I’ve been single and celibate for most of my life (both by choice), I’ve been shocked at how readily women I’ve known over the years will give into having sex with men just to have a man in their lives. Not all, mind you, but it has been (and continues to be) very prevalent. During the years I was dating (I stopped dating at 52 because I got tired of the hassle) as I look back on the men I dated, society has changed it into a battle ground that I never wanted to fight on. Sex is not something that is bartered for dinner, and it just got old beyond words. So I stopped dating. And it has nothing to do with my interest in sex. It has to due with whatever happened to respect? Whatever happened with saying no and having it be okay to say no? What has happened to the moral fiber of our society? When sex is reduced to a mere act for release and nobody really cares how they get it, that speak volumes about the society in which it has been allowed to degenerate to that level on a wide scale and become perfectly acceptable, too.
Sex does not equal love. . . . Women giving sex for love aren’t getting love. And men giving love for sex aren’t giving love. Let’s at least call it what it really is. Do we really want to know what genuine love looks like? It looks like this:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. . . . (I Corinthians 13:4-8).
That’s genuine love. And it comes with respect for others, too. And what the world needs now is a whole lot more love. . . .
Hey, hey (Mighty love)
I can feel the world gettin’ brighter
Brighter with your lovin’
(Mighty love) You see,
With a mighty love you can
Sometimes turn the world around
(Mighty love) From all your love
You can, you can turn the world around
Sometimes, yes, you can . . . .
Mighty love . . . While sex may be a powerful urge, nothing beats out love. And in the end, love is all that matters. As 1 Corinthians 13:13 states:
And now these three remain:
faith, hope and love.
But the greatest of these is love.
For God so loved the world
that he gave his one and only Son,
that whoever believes in him
shall not perish but have eternal life.
And that’s a Mighty Love . . .
Yes it is . . .
Yes it is . . . .
YouTube Video: “Mighty Love” (1974) sung by the Spinners: